breakmychest | XIII -- voice -- filtered from Drusilla;

[Guess who just reached School Hard in his Buffy rewatch? It was a weird experience. On the bright side, Spike comes off as very cool, and the part where he incinerated the Anointed One, well, he's just bloody badass. There's a small part of him that's flattered at the part where Angel talks about how terrifying an enemy he is. And of course, he and Buffy fight brilliantly together. Even if it's just actors, and it's... bloody weird. He's already decided that watching the commentary and such is more than he can take.

He also isn't crazy about seeing himself kill again. And watching Buffy with Angel, knowing how that'll turn out, seeing things he was clearly never meant to witness. Then there's Drusilla. The former love of his life, back when things were good between the two of them. Her being here is confusing and difficult and he wishes he weren't this affected. But he's always love's bitch, even if he's no longer in love with the woman in question.

God, he misses Buffy.]

So, who's found out they're fictional somewhere? And if you have, did you manage to find it? Did you bother looking? Was it... like your life?

[A pause.]

One of the new inmates, Drusilla, she's from my world. She's bloody insane and incredibly deadly. [It's one of those things he used to love about her.] I think she doesn't have a warden yet, so I guess you can talk to me if she gives you trouble. If anyone can help, it's me. Probably.

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I'm guessing that'll happen by the end of this series. Hell, it's the only part I'm actually looking forward to. [Spike's death was incredibly dashing and heroic. He's proud of it.]

Cause I'd rather know what's in it. How much these people who've watched my bloody life on the telly actually got.

I just know that wandering about the Matrix, finding out I'm used to scare little children, isn't an experience I'm inclined to risk repeating.

...why would you look forward to watching that? [Howie's proud of his, but the idea makes his skin crawl. :/]

It's surely going to be incredibly limited, whatever it is?

I'm not fictional. There was a book written by someone who apparently traveled to or saw my universe. I can tell by reading it that it was written by someone with only a vague understanding of what was going on.

I don't believe I've ever met a fictional person before, though when confronted with the popular image of myself I seem to come near enough.

I'm just going to assume that if anybody's seen this, they know everything about me that I'd rather they didn't. And if they don't, I'll be pleasantly surprised. ~~And I doubt a British TV series that ran to two seasons can be as popular as Buffy The Vampire Slayer, anyway.~~

Some guy named Max Tegmark had ideas on it.

What should I watch out for with your old friend?

I'm not fictional either, but there are books. Fictionalized history, but they're mostly about my brother-in-law.

I put that poorly. No one here's fictional, but with different universes... sometimes there are fictions in other worlds. [A pause.] Who're you?

I know you're not, pet. I'm not either. But it seems there are worlds where they think I am.

Your brother-in-law?

Sir Percy Blakeney, known to far too many these days as the Scarlet Pimpernel.

Well, I haven't even heard of it, if it helps.

Cause I was really bloody heroic. Impressed a girl I know to no end.

There are seven bloody seasons. I'm in... probably six of them, maybe five. And apparently I show up in the spin-off.

Indeed, there are quite often fictions in one's own time.

I am Sherlock Holmes. Whom might I have the pleasure of addressing?

I see. That doesn't mean you are fictional anywhere, just that there is fiction that includes you somewhere.

Hm.

You're - actually identical to someone I know from my world. I suppose this concept of 'Barge twins' would make sense if half of us are meant to be actors somewhere.

Never heard of him.

Dru? Well, she's got the sight, you know? Sees into the future. Course, understanding what she sees when she sees it's something else entirely. But she's also a bit psychic, so she might know things no one's actually told her. She's also far stronger than she looks and wouldn't feel the slightest bit of remorse if she ripped out your throat.

...The Matrix?

The repository of Time Lord knowledge, basically. It's somewhat more involved, but I spent some time in there.

I'd noticed the ability. I guess I didn't wanna provoke it by talking to her. But I have been watching.

Seems like there's a lot wrong there besides being a vampire.

...you know, I think we've gone past the point I'm comfortable with. I don't want to know if the bloke who plays me plays him too. I really, really don't.

Exactly.

Though they seem to have gotten my life spot-on. At least, everyone looks exactly how they're supposed to look. And as far as I can remember, those lines are what I said.

I see. It's not that accurate in the Wizard of Oz books. Glinda was two years older than Nessarose, so I doubt she'd have said that Nessarose at 36 was so old she'd shrivel up in the sun almost instantly. I also am pretty sure I didn't force Dorothy and her friends to be my slaves. I may have gotten drunk after a house was dropped on my sister, but not drunk enough to say some of the things I said in there.

Spike. And I hate to break it to you, but you're definitely fictional where I'm from.

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