XXVIII -- voice;

[breakmychest]

And just like that, no more Dru. Can't say I'll miss her, exactly, but I'd have liked it if she could've graduated. I mean, we had fun, back in the bad old days. Not saying I'd go back to being an evil killer. There's the soul-crushing guilt keeping me from that, and besides, I like being a hero. I'm way better at it than I ever was at being the Big Bad.

[He's quiet for a moment.]

Still, before she turned me, I was a bloody pathetic poofter. People were calling me "William the Bloody" started before I died, you know, and it wasn't because of anything violent. It was because my poetry was so bloody awful.

[Why did he say that? Spike doesn't tell anyone that. He had more to say, but he just shuts off the journal before he can. He's afraid of what might come out.]

Comments

[Private | Video]

[slayage]

Sorry, sorry.. Just-

[She snorts a little at his glare, then turns her head away, taking in a few deep breaths and calming herself with a quiet whooo sound.

Then she turns back, much less amused looking now, but still has a little smile.]

It's only fair, you getting to watch a TV show about my life before you met me, that I get this... [Oh no, the laughing is threatening to return.] .. Gem.

[She pauses, looking as if she suddenly had a big thought. Then the giggle-fest threatening to return fades away. Buffy looks more serious now, but she's still in good humor. She scrunches her eyebrows together.]

Actually. No. No it's still not fair.

[Private | Video]

[bigbad]

[Spike tolerates the laughter, scowling.]

Well, you were still an interesting person back then. I--

[He shakes his head.]

Could have been worse, I suppose. I'm not exactly looking to build my reputation as the big bad anymore. Still, it's far in the past, you know? Not something I want to tell everyone.

[Private | Video]

[slayage]

Yeah. Your great-great-great.. great.. Is that one too many greats?- Grand-sire was a jerk.

[Buffy smiles genuinely at all this.]

Nah, I'm just giving you a hard time. [And yes she did find and read the poem, and so did Dawn.]

[Private | Video]

[bigbad]

Just two greats. Though my great grandsire was a bitch too. And I can't say me and my grandsire have always gotten along so great. Guess I'm just not much of a family man.

[He glances up at her again at this and smiles back.]

I don't mind you knowing, you know? Just wish I could have made the choice to tell you, not have it come shooting out of me without any deciding happening on my end.

[Private | Video]

[slayage]

[That's interesting, Spike, you insulted The Master and Darla, but you didn't insult Angel.] What kind of a vampire uses guns, anyway?

Hopefully I won't get the urge to confess something for all to see.

[Private | Video]

[bigbad]

[He's got plenty of insults for Angel. But they're different ones than the ones he'd use for Darla or the Master. More personal.] Darla never did like getting her hands dirty.

[Spike's kind of curious as to what she'd confess, but.]

It might help if you don't put anything up on the journals. That seems to be where it's coming from.